🔥 EVERYTHING MUST GOWE ARE LOSING MONEY ON EVERY SALEPRICES SLASHED — WE DOUBLED THEM FIRSTPERPETUAL GOING-OUT-OF-BUSINESS SALEESTATE · CLEARANCE · FINAL DAYS (ONGOING)MOTIVATED SELLER · MUST LIQUIDATEHOSTILE TAKEOVERS WELCOMEDWE ARE BEGGINGOUR PRICES ARE CRAZY (WE CHECKED)SEEKING ACQUISITION · WE WILL NOT FIGHT IT 🔥 EVERYTHING MUST GOWE ARE LOSING MONEY ON EVERY SALEPRICES SLASHED — WE DOUBLED THEM FIRSTPERPETUAL GOING-OUT-OF-BUSINESS SALEESTATE · CLEARANCE · FINAL DAYS (ONGOING)MOTIVATED SELLER · MUST LIQUIDATEHOSTILE TAKEOVERS WELCOMEDWE ARE BEGGINGOUR PRICES ARE CRAZY (WE CHECKED)SEEKING ACQUISITION · WE WILL NOT FIGHT IT
$☠
Perpetually going out of business
Cash or Death
50% off
the real price
We are desperate. Our prices are crazy. We are losing money on every sale.
We double every price so we can slash it in half. Please. Buy the towel.
Cash or Death

≈ Everything We Have · Estate Sale

The catch-all. Every price doubled, then 50% off. That is the real price. We are not okay. See it cheaper at the Wei →
Perri Wei
LIQUIDATION · 50% OFF
Perri Wei — This is the Wei (Water Bottle)
50% off $131.80
$65.90
The Towel
MUST GO · 50% OFF
The Towel — The Towel Is a Lie (Blanket)
50% off $74.80
$37.40
Lav Towel
FIRE SALE · 50% OFF
Lav Towel — Your final pose will always be Savasana
50% off $67.80
$33.90
Polar Solvent
MOLECULAR FIRE SALE · 50% OFF
Polar Solvent — Di-Polar Water Bottle
50% off $59.80
$29.90
Investor Relations

Cash or Death is for sale.

Motivated seller. Everything must go — including the company. We are overleveraged on inventory that is mostly the same two products at twice the price. Margins are a rumor. The founder is in the pool. Hostile takeovers welcomed; we will not fight it. Strip us for parts. Assume the debt. Take the towels. We are begging.

Inquire within the void ↗